To be prepared for a long-term relationship with a man, it is important to be mentally ready in three essential areas:

1. You need to be prepared to contribute 50/50 towards your shared dreams. Achieving goals together will require financial, emotional, and mental effort. You must be willing to take on half of the overall burden. If he contributes more in one area — for instance, financially — you should be ready to invest more in another — such as maintaining the emotional balance.
2. You need to be prepared for his failures, because they will inevitably happen. At the very least, you should not hinder his efforts to get through them; ideally, you should help him overcome them — but never by drawing attention to the failure itself. The best thing you can do in relation to his setbacks is to act as if they do not exist. Give him time, quietly observe the direction things are taking, and support his emotional wellbeing.
3. You should be able to enjoy your shared accomplishments 50/50 — it ought to bring you 50 percent of the joy, no more and no less. The remaining joy will either be his alone, or something you both experience equally.

This kind of balance will allow him to value you, and you — in turn — to feel independent and self-sufficient. And the opposite is also true.

Just 25 years ago (before the rise of smartphones and social media), for any woman to feel desired and gain attention from unfamiliar men, she had to step outside. This was the only way. She had to make herself beautiful (in reality, not just in photos), and engage with men to receive a compliment. The number of new acquaintances she could make in a day ranged from 0 to a few, when strolling through crowded places where people often meet. But more often than not, it was just 0 or 1 new acquaintance.

Once smartphones with social media appeared, all a woman had to do was post a couple of photos online and receive dozens, even hundreds, of compliments and proposals, tailored to any taste. At times, women might have thousands of unread messages across several apps. The advent of filters soon made it unnecessary to look like your photo in real life. As a result, one could look good only occasionally, stay at home, have thousands of admirers, feel desired, and never meet a single man face to face. Men, at first, tried to attract women through messages, putting thought and wit into their words, but when they didn’t receive a response, they started writing more, paying less attention to what they wrote, creating fierce competition among themselves with almost no chance of a reply. And now, men are giving up on this entirely (as women stopped meeting men on the street around 10–15 years ago), as it has become a fruitless waste of energy, time, and unmet expectations.

Women’s profiles on social media and dating apps often reveal two recurring patterns.

Firstly, very often they read more like a list of demands placed on the man rather than information about the woman herself — something like, “I value ambition, care, confidence, a sense of humour, and intelligence in a man.”
As a result, the man is once again faced with a set of expectations, which tends to put him off straight away — particularly when these are the same points repeated in almost every second profile.

Secondly, even when a woman tries to write about herself, it often ends up sounding like this: “I enjoy discovering new things, travelling, and good food. I go to the gym, practise yoga, meditate, and appreciate art.”
This kind of description either lists things that everyone enjoys, or else it mentions hobbies that do not actually interest men and fail to catch their attention.

It is like if a man were to write: “I’m into football and video games. I like going to the pub and meeting friends. Looking for a beautiful woman.” — at best, it comes across as banal.

It is far better to write something in your profile that might genuinely interest a man — for instance, qualities in yourself that men tend to appreciate in a partner, or specific activities that he would be happy to support. These should not impose any kind of obligation on him, but rather show your interest in his human qualities rather than in his resources.

Many women may believe that most men are only looking for casual relationships and are not ready for long-term commitment. And that, supposedly, there are men who are only interested in long-term relationships. I dare to say that both of these are myths.

Men do tend to seek casual relationships more often, but that does not mean they are not open to long-term ones. The decision depends entirely on the answer to one question:

"Does this particular man expect that being in a long-term relationship with this particular woman will be better and more comfortable for him than remaining single, as he lives now?"

And it is only how a man answers this question while interacting with a woman that determines what he truly wants with her.

A small remark: for us men, communication in itself is not a benefit, a source of energy, or a pleasure, as it often is for women. We always communicate with a purpose—whether for useful information or knowledge. And in the modern world, one can even converse with artificial intelligence in search of knowledge.

This is to say that when women write in their dating profiles or their objectives, "Just to chat" or "Looking for conversation," it means, in reality, that there is nothing for a man to be interested in. The profile’s objectives should include something that will personally spark the interest of your future partner.

Women often ask online: "In what public places can I meet single men?" Or: "Where can I meet men outside of dating apps?" Or: "How can I meet men in real life?" And many respond by listing all sorts of everyday places—volleyball or climbing clubs, coffee shops, bookshops.

The truth is that, first, single men can be found absolutely everywhere, just like everyone else. Second, to go to a volleyball club, you at least need to be interested in volleyball. And third, there is no guarantee that, once you find yourself surrounded by men in a volleyball club, you will not experience the same difficulties with meeting them that you do now.

So, in reality, the questions should be: How do you recognise that a man wants to approach you and encourage him to do so? How do you prepare yourself for an unexpected approach from a stranger? And, more importantly, how should you behave if you meet a man you like—wherever that may be?